By Violetta Reum
Healing is a journey.
It is not an easy process that only requires a couple prayers and a friend or two who can listen and encourage. It is difficult and painful.
But God desperately wants for us to embark on this journey with Him.
Healing is never truly done. We have been healed. We are healing right now as God is revealing new things to us about our story, binding up old wounds and helping us to work through our daily triggers.
And God will heal us. Yes, tomorrow, but also in Heaven.
Finally, when our lives end and we are ready to spend eternity with God, the Word promises us that we will enter Heaven perfect, healed and blameless.
There will be no more pain and no more tears. There will be only worship and glorifying of God.
But until then, we are to continue our beautiful but difficult work of healing and surrendering everything to God.
When it gets especially hard or when I doubt my own growth or healing, I find it incredibly helpful to recall my own journey of healing and how much God has already done in my life.
There is no better evidence of God’s work in your life than your own testimony.
You know that it is true because you have experienced it, felt it, seen it. You know it was really God because you know yourself and how truly incapable you are of healing yourself. And you also know that it is true and real because you know how much your heart has changed and expanded, and that is the kind of work that only you and God can see.
These experiences that I will share are my own and have come from my own journey in healing.
Your experiences might look very different or very similar. I simply want to share this evidence of God’s hand in my journey.
Honestly, this list and these recollections are more for me than for you probably.
Every so often, I have to remind myself of how far I have come so I can stand firm in my own growth and my experience with God.
I find that this is crucial in fighting the lies of the enemy and the doubts about my progress he tends to plant in my head.
Still, I hope it provides some encouragement to you as well.
Evidence #1: Marriage
After I came out of my denial about my abuse and had to face the sin that followed my life after, I thought that I was broken, dirty and “too far gone” to ever consider marriage.
After years of work and healing, I can now say that I have a happy and healthy marriage where I feel safe, heard, loved, adored and challenged.
Our relationship is not based on selfishness, manipulation, or jealousy. Of course, we aren’t perfect and we are still healing from our individual traumas, but overall, we have a marriage that is life-giving, Kingdom-focused and restful for both of us.
Evidence #2: Relationships with men
Because of my abuse, I used to think that all men functioned and thought the same way which made it very difficult for me to trust them. On the other hand, because misuse of authority was such a prevalent part of my abuse, I also had a hard time keeping boundaries with men in authority.
I am now able to have healthy interactions with men in general and allow for friendships to grow without ulterior motives. I have learned how to put up healthy boundaries with men and to foster mutually honoring relationships.
Evidence #3: Lifestyle
Though my story has not changed, I truly believe that the outcome of it has changed drastically. Because of my abuse and the way I viewed myself after, I went down a very dark path of self-destruction and self-hate that masqueraded as “having fun” and general rebellious behavior.
Once I came out of my denial and got honest with myself about the kind of person I want to be, I have seen an absolute 180 degree change. I am now more my true self and I no longer feel like I have to hide. I have people around me who know me and love me for who I am and challenge me to live an authentic life.
Evidence #4: Freedom
When I began my journey in healing, I never thought I would be able to forgive my abuser. I felt that it was my duty to “punish” him by holding on to my anger, bitterness and unforgiveness.
But God had a different plan for me. After years of many prayers, tears and countless surrenders, I really believe that I have forgiven him. Granted, I do not have a relationship with him and I don’t believe it is necessary for me to pursue that. Still, I feel freedom from the baggage that I used to drag into every relationship and relational dynamic.
Evidence #5: Interactions
Abuse, especially childhood abuse, is a huge part of a victim’s view of the world and the way they interact with others. What I learned from my abuse is that I need to protect myself because no one else was going to look out for me. How this self-protection showed up was in my negative attitude, my sarcasm, and my constant judgement of others. I was going to keep everyone at a distance to the best of my ability. My interactions even with my closest friends and family were filled with distrust and I hurt many people that I love.
We shouldn’t live life that way, we are meant to connect with others, care for each other and connect on a deep, emotional level. Once I began working through my abuse, I realized that it became easier and easier to open up, connect and have grace with others. I began having real, meaningful relationship and I no longer felt alone.
God is continuously reminding me of the ways He has grown me and how different my life looks now because of it.
We have to remember to celebrate this!
I hope that this evidence of healing showed you that the hard work is worth it and it does truly matter. Your story matters and you matter deeply to God.
I hope you are able to take a moment and ask God to show you the evidence of healing in your own life.
Author: Violetta Reum
Violetta has always had a passion and calling to see people pursue God with their entire lives, find their calling and identity in Jesus, and seek deep healing from past trauma and abuse. She enjoys spending time with her husband and son and discovering all of the coffee shops and hole-in-the-wall restaurants.